inner game · millennial · relationship · self-improvement · twenties

Most single men live plain boring lives.

I could have said most people live plain boring lives but that sounds so cliche. Now I work in a profession full of younger professionals, usually fresh out of college and in their twenties. Despite living in a big city, I’d say that almost half the guys I know are married or in a long-term relationship.  Now that leaves the rest of the guys I know who are single and I have to say, the vast majority live very plain boring lives.

Don’t get me wrong, guys in relationships live plain boring lives too for the most part and often more-so than single men. The point I am trying to get across is that even single men who have the freedom and the time are not really living that interesting of a life worth looking at. I can probably predict the kind of life most single guys live and it goes something like this.


  • Typically work from 9 to 5
  • Go home after a commute
  • Worn out so now they either watch TV while having dinner
  • Watch more TV and then go to sleep


  • MAYBE go out on a Friday or Saturday night (usually with the same old college friends)
  • Watch sports at a bar
  • Get the urge to approach girls but never really do it
  • When approaching girls be very indirect and veil their intentions (“oh you’re an XYZ college fan, me too! Woo!”, something I have been guilty of)
  • Go home and start the dreaded workweek while complaining that weekends are too short


  • Longs for the past and his “Glory Days” (“I was the man in college bro!”)
  • Complains about how life sucks after college
  • Whines about how tough it is to meet women
  • Swears that college years are the “best four years of your life”
  • Talks about how much adulthood sucks
  • Reminisce about the past all the time
  • Wishes that some girl would just “find” him
  • Talks about how good it would be to meet his dream girl and how he would treat her rather than actually being proactive about it
  • Gets upset about minor things like sports and celebrities

Future outlook:

  • Longs for that one promotion that he swears will change his life
  • Dreams about a wife, kids, and a house with a picket fence
  • Longs for love and intimacy with his dream girl while doing no work on making himself her dream man
  • No real 5 to 10 year plan for life
  • Really just “winging it”

What are some things we have noticed about the plain boring single man?

  • Not proactive about things at all
  • Lives in the past too much and often romanticizes it
  • Not grateful for his current situation
  • Puts in no work to build a better exciting future

I am not really attacking such a guy too much given that I used to be there myself.

I used to be that guy who would think there is no future to look forward to, lived in the past too much, and was never proactive about my career, dating, and my development. For the longest of time, I thought that things would just “happen”. I’d be walking to work and some supermodel would approach me, asking for marriage. One day I walk in and despite a mediocre performance, I’d get that promotion. Maybe one day I walk in and luck just happens right? WRONG!

Here’s the reality, no one is coming to save you, your fucked unless you do something and time is running out.

Nothing is going to magically happen and change if you continue down the same path. Don’t get me wrong, if your ambition is the same as the 99% of other people out there, then fine. Get that promotion, get married, get that mortgage, and out into the suburbs you go. You don’t actually belong in the pickup and red pill type of communities anyways. Be like the rest of the world and continue down your path. Maybe you mix and match enough with old friends that the girl who looked down at you in college might now give you a chance since she is bored and had her fun. If you want to be something exceptional, it is no going to happen living the same boring life.

You won’t meet hot girls unless you proactively go out there, approach them, and talk to them making your intentions clear.

You won’t get the dream job unless you make yourself a dream candidate.

You won’t become a millionaire unless you work like how one was working tirelessly in their twenties.

You won’t find fulfillment if you keep living in the past.

You won’t get ahead if  you hang out with losers still stuck in the past.

So if you want to avoid a lack of fulfillment and not live the boring life, do not be like this guy. On my next post, I will cover how interesting and alpha men I know live their lives to give you a bit of an outline.

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