self-improvement · social media

Is online dating worth it?

I have seen a lot of arguments for and against the idea of online dating so I wanted to answer one of the questions that is going through your head. Is it worth it? For those of you who read my story about the night I lost my virginity, my dating life actually turned around with stellar dating photos and a good profile. Now it is only natural for me to have my biases towards online dating as that is where a great deal of my success has come from but let’s try to be somewhat objective here as hard as that might be for me.

First of all, let’s look at the statistics.

According to an article by Statista, 39% of couples met online which makes it the most popular way to meet women. In the chart, you can see that the runner up were bars and restaurants followed by friends, work, school/college (shockingly!), and lastly family. As you can see, it was the most popular way people met back in 2017 and I am sure it has only gone up since, especially with the lockdowns happening. So if you were to follow statistics, you would see that it is in your benefit to set up a profile.

Lets look more at the stastistics.

If you are a guy, then the gender ratio is clearly not in your favor on Tinder from what you can see on the link here. Overall for online dating sites, men slightly outnumber women as you can see.

So you are left with a statistical dilemma here. On one hand, most couples are meeting through online dating but on the other, the odds are not in your favor as a guy. We have some statistics here to help you out and give you the lay of the land but now let’s talk more about online dating and you.

The truth is, it really boils down to the kind of guy you are. Certain kinds of guys can thrive with online dating and would be fools to not use it while others are better off avoiding it.

Guys who should be using online dating.

Any guy who is good looking.

If you are in great shape, chiseled, and can look good without a shirt on then you are a fool to be missing out online dating. People do bring race up a lot here and I will be doing a post on that in the future but I have not really found it to matter that much. Good looking guys of minority groups can still get good looking or at least decent looking women from their own background with online dating.

Any guy who is good with social media.

If you can post good pics on Instagram and manage to get a following based off of that, you can probably make yourself out to be an interesting person. In fact, you might be able to get photos of yourself done to where you can make yourself out to be an appealing guy who “gets it”. Guys who do well with social media as I have noticed also do well with online dating.

Any guy who is not good with talking to women out of the blue.

If you are not good with cold approaching and cannot seem to master it, online dating might be worth checking out if you are not completely out of shape or hideous. Cold approaching is hard and outside of major cities like NYC and such, it might even be socially weird. If you are not in a situation where you can rely on cold approach to meet women, I highly recommend using online dating apps if you are not hideous. To top that off, any guy who struggles with social skills and is late to that game might also benefit from practicing on online dating.

Any guy without a significant social circle or group of friends.

If you do not have a consistent group of friends who you can rely on to meet women through or a lack of social circles in your life, you are kind of in a less than ideal spot. Now typically you can use cold approach but constantly going out alone is going to be mentally taxing for you. In that situation, your best bet might not only be to use online dating to meet girls but also make friends, Bumble has a feature for this.

Guys who would be better off avoiding online dating.

Ugly and/or out of shape guys.

If you are ugly or significantly overweight, I recommend looking away from online dating to meet women or just getting in shape first. Not only do you want to do this for the sake of meeting women but for your own health. The benefits of being in good shape and looking good cannot be overestimated enough.

Guys who already have it figured out in all other avenues.

If you have a powerful social circle and are managing to have serious success with cold approaches, I recommend just sticking to that. Online dating at this point should be a supplement to you, not something you go for as a mainstay.

Most of all, is it worth it in the end?

Online dating is worth it these days at least as a supplement and given the lockdown, might even be more valuable. Most women in various places in the looks scale will look into online dating or are on it. Statistics have proven that a great deal of couples, majority even, meet through online dating which means good looking and cool girls can be found on dating apps and are meeting men through  that.

The only situation where it is not worth it is if you have everything else figured out or done so well in one aspect of the game such as cold approach or social circle that it is kind of an afterthought. Anyone who is not in a situation where they are regularly succeeding through other avenues needs to give online dating a chance. Chances are, if you read this post to the end, it is worth it! 🙂

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