inner game · personal · psychology · self-improvement

One of the worst things you can do: keep digging

Hey everyone, I am glad to be back after a very long hiatus. I’d say life really got to me and I had way too much on my plate. Some things went by the wayside and I got overwhelmed, it was all too much really. Work had become more intense than ever and it got the better of me as I had no work-life balance. Now, as 2020 ends, I am finally getting some much needed time to write.

You get into an argument or inadvertently do something that really pisses someone off. Maybe it is at work, maybe it is a relationship, or maybe it is a close friend. You said something, did something, or acted in a way that pissed them off. Maybe it was just the situation and how it all transpired that made you out to be the target of their rage.

So you approach them and try to explain yourself. Maybe you try to explain your actions and hope they would understand as they are fuming mad.

Maybe was a situation involving a girl where you texted her or came on too strong. So she gets creeped out or scared, walks away, gives a disgruntled troubled look, or just gets fearful. Maybe you try to be more persistent or try your luck with “better game”.

Don’t fucking do it man, BACK OFF!

Yup, you heard me right, back the fuck off. I know every fiber of your being will want to keep fighting whether it is for pride or to save yourself. Maybe it is your ego getting the better of you in the hopes of trying to change an opinion or a situation.

Most of the times though, the absolute best thing you can do, is just back off. Most people need their space to cool off and just unwind from it all. In fact, a lot of times, you are better off just letting them cool off or just talking to them well after the fact when the mood is more calm.

A mistake I have made and keep making is that I have kept digging and going at a situation where it was clear that the other person was in no room to negotiate or talk it out. Sometimes, people just want to be left alone and in their thoughts. The worst thing you can do is keep on pushing when the person has made it clear that they do not want to talk or negotiate anything.

Sometimes, inaction and patience is your best friend.

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