You have been eyeing that promotion for quite some time, it should so be yours, and you have fulfilled all of the checkmarks to get it. Right? Now all you have to do is climb one ring on the ladder, then another, and another, and then you will get to where you want to get to.
You have your eyes on this gorgeous blue-eyed brunette with the looks of a prime Megan Fox but, hold on. You are not a rich guy with the looks of a young Cristiano Ronaldo yet. You do not have that large social circle with popular friends and that lifestyle of a rockstar.
I’ll stop my examples there.
Before I continue, I don’t want to get all motivational speaker on you and sound like I am saying none of the stuff matters.
I get it, competence and having your shit together does matter. If you know for a fact that you do not have your looks in order and are not the best version of yourself, perhaps you could do with some self-improvement. For me to tell you that some overweight slob is going to be more desired than some Jeremy Meeks lookalike (status not applicable here) is asinine.
Instead, I am trying to say this for guys who cannot get what they want in life because of things out of their control.
You have proven your worth at work and accomplished what has been asked but they still won’t promote you, and you are confident in knowing that you can do well in that role they need to promote you to. After all has been said and done, go ahead and carve your own path. Take your chance on a rival company or another company that will give you a chance.
Likewise for women and dating.
You know your life rocks and you have a lot of cool shit to offer but for some BS reason, you can’t seem to get the kinds of women you want. Perhaps it is prejudice on their end, perhaps it is some BS social status game, or it is whatever.
Fuck it, go ahead and approach the kinds of girls you want within social means. Go ahead and chat up that hot blonde or sexy Latina (whichever suits your taste) at a bar, chances are she is probably dying for some interesting guy to chat her up and save her from the boring guys in her circle who have to rely on status to meet women. Make your case and be that guy who is making her life more interesting.
Now if you read what I have said so far, great. I am not saying you are going to win over a girl who is a 10 being the fat slob loser that you are. I am saying if you have genuinely put in the work to make yourself an attractive guy but due to some BS reason such as prejudice or her social circle being too tight getting in the way, in other words things out of your control, invite yourself to her life!
There is no clear cut way to getting attractive women that you want in your life, there are many ways to getting them. There is no clear cut way to getting your dream job, there are many ways to go about it, now more so than ever.
All too often, we confine ourselves to a clear path to getting what we want and close so many doors around us.
You do not have to go to a top university in order to get a top tier job. You do not have to force yourself to be in some popular social circle in order to get the friends and attractive women you want. Quite frankly, after some time you realize that once you have put in the work on making yourself an attractive guy (controlling what you can), you yourself are enough.