For all young men out there, I decided to make this post as I get closer to 30. I hear how things like debt, drugs, legal troubles, not getting educated, and alcoholism can mess up your life. Well, I want to talk about the one thing that can mess up your twenties and your life far more than anything else you can imagine. I tell you this because as my readers, all of you will hopefully go out on many dates and associate with many different people at some point. So what will mess up your life more than drugs, alcohol, bad credit, and perhaps even legal troubles?
In almost close to 30 years of being alive, I have seen this one thing ruin more lives and kill more potential than anything else out there. Some of you got this lecture when you were in middle school or high school but you probably ignored it. Well, now that you are adults, you need to hear it because it can save your life. For those of you who have fucked up their lives a bit, maybe this hits home more than you want it to.
The one thing that will mess up your life more than anything else…
Toxic people.
Vampires but not of the literal blood sucking type, much worse some will say. When I say “toxic people”, I don’t just mean narcissists and people in your life that you deal with who bring out negative emotions in you. I also throw bad friends, toxic women, and most importantly, anyone in your life that can get you in trouble with the law.
Now let’s talk about why I am actually mentioning this.
As guys who are dedicated to meeting attractive women and perhaps even engaging in the hedonistic lifestyle of sleeping around a lot, you will run into a good deal of toxic people. Perhaps the biggest downfall as you pursuit financial and dating success are the amount of people you encounter who are just flat out toxic. You will encounter toxic people as you try to get rich because they come with the territory but most of all, you will also encounter them as you try to sleep with a lot of hot women. It makes you wonder if it is all really worth it in the end but I leave that question as something you can answer for yourself.
In your pursuit of success with beautiful women, you will encounter toxic people in all aspects of life, especially with the women you want to be with themselves. If you engage in night game? Guarantee that a decent number of the staff who work at the establishments are sketchy in some ways. You will run into your fair share of people who have had some legal troubles due to their own actions and are trying to drag you down with them.
You will be pushed into doing illegal things by toxic people for them. First they try to earn your trust and then see if they can get you to do something you might not be comfortable with. Eventually, once they get that pass, you can be used by them as a vessel for illegal activity.
Worst of all, it is the influence.
You hang with toxic people that do drugs, some of those drugs illegal, and eventually you will end up doing drugs yourself. Pretty soon, you either overdose because you cannot handle it or you get caught with drugs by the cops and are now potentially facing a felony.
You hang out with people that not only drink a lot but are also bold in driving. First they tell you it is only a couple of drinks and then you end up having more than you wanted. You didn’t Uber to the spot and next thing you know, you are driving home drunk. Now a cop notices and pulls you over, worst case scenario you face an arrest and also a DUI which goes on your record forever.
You hang with a group of guys who are more confrontational than average and are not afraid to cause trouble at a bar. One night you go out and they get on their usual drunk and drug-fueled antics which lead to a brawl breaking out because they pissed off the wrong guys. Now you are involved because that’s “your boy” and maybe you throw a few hard left hooks that seriously hurt someone. Cops arrive and you get charged with assault, your night ends with you being arrested.
What was the common underlying theme in all of that?
Toxic friends.
Drinking is not really a problem, I drink, but driving drunk is. Would you have driven drunk if you were not under the influence of toxic friends? Similar things can be said about drugs and fighting. I do not do drugs and haven’t been in a fight since college but the point of this should be, obey the fucking law! The second your friends start telling you to do illegal shit or egging you on to do shit that can get you into legal trouble, run.
Breaking from it all is a lot tougher than you think.
When you want a social life, it can be tougher to break from toxic people than you may think. For one, the fact of the matter is that yes, sketchy and toxic dudes do get their fair share of beautiful women and have them in their social circle. A big portion of beautiful women love going to coke fueled parties and they love doing drugs, unfortunately.
Even in your professional life, drug use is going to be common in your coworkers. Lots of white collar professionals do coke. In some cases, you do end up being the odd one out if you are not doing coke in the office while everyone else is. Thankfully, the job market is pretty fucking good right now.
Some of us are born into toxic families and cannot easily escape from it. We may feel like we have an obligation to our family members. In that case, there is a tough decision to make for sure.
The first step does come in identifying the people in your life who can get you into trouble and then trying to keep as much distance as you can between them. Believe me when I say that you can live a great life and meet good women without getting yourself into toxic situations.
Social media is very toxic for me. No matter in what place I am seeing other going on vacations, having kids makes me feel like I’m missing out on everything. Deactivating social media has been one of the biggest ways to remove this toxicity I would say.
Yeah I say use it very wisely and do not get enamored or obsessed with it.