In every pickup community and most communities with discussions that involve men trying to have dating success, race is something that commonly comes up. I’ve even seen men proactively invade forums and other places with the sole purpose of saying how you cannot have dating success because of your race or that you have to compensate in a big way. If I had to break down the common backgrounds who make this complaint from order of most to least, it would be: Indian, Asian, Middle Eastern/Arabian, and Black. Now naturally, we want to try and help these men but nine out of ten times, it goes nowhere.

So what it is it with these men? What’s their deal?

Do they actually want to learn how to get good with women?

Not exactly, most of the times they are 100% convinced that being their ethnic background is a massive setback in meeting women. Most of the times, they are convinced that either being their background is a disadvantage you cannot work with or something they have to compensate for in a big way. So are they trying to learn how to compensate for their “disadvantage” in a big way? What do they want exactly?

The truth is that these men are so far gone that even if someone of their exact background was to have success with women, they would come up with an excuse.

I experienced this first hand when I had an Indian roommate from Atlanta who claimed that being Indian was a death sentence with women. One of my friends happened to be an Indian guy from Chicago who was quite the natural that got laid regularly.

Now this roommate I was stuck with was:

  • Overweight
  • Wore oversized clothes
  • Did not look out for his appearance (had bushy eyebrows and hair which at times had lice showing)
  • Was never the type to be fun at the parties (walked around with a resting bitch face)

This is not to even bring up the fact that whenever you talked to the guy, it was usually depressing as hell. The guy was a loser who was only able to afford living in Manhattan due to his parents having the money to fund his big city lifestyle. All he did was drink coffee and join some political group that was borderline into some socialist stuff, never tried to probe into it much myself.

One day, the Indian natural I am friends with comes over and he brings a white girl and a Latina (who he was sleeping with) over. Indian roommate who usually stays locked up in a room comes out, his eye almost red from probably the night staying up, and eyes down my friend. The girls are all kind of freaked out over the guy who looks sort of scary and he goes to use the restroom. We keep talking about I notice for well over twenty minutes, he is not coming out. When he finally comes out, we mostly ignore him and he seems to be walking back to his room until he turns to look back at us and points to my Indian friend.

“Hey, you’re Indian right?”, asks my roommate.

“Uh yeah,” says my friend.

“So that’s your girlfriend?” he asks, pointing to the white girl as she looks a bit confused and uncomfortable at her Latina friend.

“Uh no,” replies my friend.

“Oh, so how do you know these girls?” asks the roommate.

“Hey dude, we are like really talking about something personal so if you don’t mind,” says the Latina.

“Oh but I am just asking a question,” says my roommate.

“Anand, we are talking about something personal man, me and you can chat later on and I’ll let you know of what is going on here alright?” I say to him.

“Sure man, hey if you guys go out, let me know,” says my roommate.

“Sure will man,” I reply.

The girls and my friend propose that we go to a nearby bar and chat there. We walk out and the Latina who had been sleeping with my Indian friend says that my roommate was so fucking creepy. Now it was not the first time my roommate had done something like this, in fact, he habitually did this when girls came over. One time, he flat out asked a girl I had slept with the night before the following morning if she normally goes home with random guys and then told her he is available too if she wants to see him. Yeah, that’s how awkward this guy was.

A day later, he found me out in our living room and asked me what the deal with my Indian friend was. I told him he was sleeping with those girls casually because back then, I didn’t know better. The roommate says he must be their dealer or they must be escorts. Yet again, he shifts from there to saying how there is no way those girls would sleep with an Indian guy unless drugs or money were involved. I kept a straight face instead of arguing with him and told him I do not know what is going on there, hoping he’d leave me to be.

Here’s the problem, if you ever tried to tell him what he was doing was making people uncomfortable, he blamed it on him being Indian and if he was white he would get away with it. Yeah, that’s what I lived with for about six months before he bounced back to Atlanta. The reason was that my roommate’s parents were tired of funding his lifestyle while he mostly sat at home posting on Reddit and joining nonsense political groups.

Here is the truth about most guys who say they cannot laid because of their race.

You may think that perhaps these guys really think of themselves as the lowest of the low or maybe it’s because they think they are undesirable. While that is partially true, the reality is that these men are significantly more narcissistic and egotistical than you may initially think.

The truth is that deep down inside, these men know that there is something seriously wrong with them. Almost all of the time, there is something seriously off about these men. If you ever talk to one, and I have talked to plenty, you leave feeling like you have been dumped in a pool of depression and hopelessness. Most other men avoid these men because of how contagiously depressed and negative they come off, these guys are toxic and make people around them miserable because remember, emotions are contagious.

At the same time, these men do not want to confront those weaknesses in themselves so they use race as a convenient cop out. Engaging with you on studies that show response rates based on race and how much easier one race has it than the other are a great use of their time. Why? Because they don’t have to do shit, they can simply talk with you and waste your time with nonsense statistics. Any pitch you may make for self-improvement? They can go to their convenient “but I am 10% less likely to get laid because of my race”.

The truth about these men is that they have a very delicate ego and cannot stand to admit that women avoid them because, quite frankly, they suck. Take my Indian roommate for example who was a chubby guy with poor style and hygiene, lived off of his parents, and tried to sound smart despite not having much career success and yet claimed his issue was that he was Indian. Even when he saw an Indian guy do well, he tried to rationalize it in other ways. Here’s another inconvenient truth, this is the same guy who is going to post on reddit about how big of a handicap being Indian is and people are going to take him seriously, being oblivious to how much of a mess he is in the real world.

Almost every single time, I’d wager to say every single time really, there is something seriously off with these guys. If not something outwardly obvious, it is a serious inner-game issue that even drives other men away from them. What has happened is that these men have used race as an excuse to escape all accountability and not fix their lives.

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