Continuing on the discussion of race, I wanted to actually address the other elephant in the room around perception. For example, whenever you go out to the clubs and see the guys that the best looking women are going for, they tend to commonly be of certain backgrounds compared to others. On the other end, why is it that men who commonly complain of their race holding them back when it comes to attracting women usually Indian or Asian?
Some will say it has to do with media stereotypes because the media stereotypes certain men as being desirable while certain men are not so desirable. I used to think that this is why so many Asian and especially Indian men struggled with dating and meeting women, because of the way they were perceived in media. After hanging out with a great deal of Indian guys over the years, I realized that I was being a bit too naive and easily swayed.
What I have found over the years is that some cultures just a lot more well-versed when it comes to this than others.
I have never met an Indian guy in the US who was raised in Indian culture and still managed to do well. The culture runs on arranged marriages and showing of career success which is counterproductive to being that guy who gets into game with the intent of getting with a lot of women. What has on the other hand amazed me is just how good with women West Indian men are in comparison. Genetically, these men are no different than their East Indian counterparts but the way they act is entirely different.
Similarly, while Asian men do a lot better than Indian men when it comes to game, I notice that Asian culture is also not that conductive to game. The extra humility and being docile which may be awarded in an Asian American household just doesn’t sit so well when it comes to pursuing women in the US. Now while race does not always equal culture, there is usually a strong correlation. I mean sure there are Asian and Indian guys that got adopted by white families in their youth but generally, most Asian and Indian men will be raised in their own culture to some degree as even “Americanized” and “Westernized” Indians retain many parts of their culture.
Generally speaking, cultures that are focused heavily towards academic success will not produce men that are good with women. Now this is why it is all too common to hear of Engineers who struggle to get laid while club promoters, despite making far less, do better with women. After all of this, it is no mystery that the ethnic groups which tend to have a lot of academic success in the US also produce a lot of men that struggle to get laid.
Just the thinking itself lends to men that overthink every situation, get too obsessed with the numbers, lack the irrational confidence that less educated men might have, and by and large are unable to relate to most people (especially attractive women). Pay attention to language here, I am not saying that these men are necessarily smarter or dumber because academic success does not always equal to intelligence. Last thing I want is for someone to think of me calling certain ethnic groups of men stupid and others smart, that isn’t true. Yet, the kind of intelligence that lends itself to academic success does the exact opposite when it comes to dating success.
The toughest part is convincing the men themselves of that because they all too often think it is based on skin color and ethnic appearance.
Going back to my example of West Indian versus East Indian men and how I notice that West Indian men do far better despite looking exactly like their East Indian counterparts. The problem is that East Indian men are dorky and generally display all of the beta male stereotypes that causes them to suffer immensely in the western dating market. When you try to tell them it is their behavior? Their egos are so massive that they will claim you are wrong and their failure is far out of their control.
Now this is part of the reason why toxic hivemind communities have thrived, because these men can just circlejerk and keep convincing each other that their failure is due to racism. Plus, playing the race card is far more convenient than actually changing your behavior and the way you think about things. Convincing an academically oriented guy that he is thinking about things the wrong way is almost impossible as their egos are too massive to hear another viewpoint.
Then why do white guys have success? They are dorky too!
I will use white guys here as an example because of how much the success in that group varies. Yes, most men who slay are white but on the same token, most incels are white as well because whites are the majority. Plus, even amongst whites there are so many different ethnic groups because the Irish are not that similar to the Jews.
From what I have observed, the “Chads” who are white carry themselves far more differently than incel white guys do. In white culture itself, there is significant variety in how men are raised. I also notice this with Asian cultures too as Filipino guys do not have nearly the same dating struggles that Indian and Chinese American guys do.
Ultimately, it comes down to much you really want to have success with women and be that guy.
Having been around enough Indian guys, I can confidently say that 95% of Indian guys out there do not want to do well with women. Most Indian men are happy with an arranged marriage or just living the average life that they do not even try all that hard, same goes for Asian men. I even notice this with communities I browse like Asian Masculinity which put on the mask of making Asian guys fight back against sexual stereotypes so they can have dating success but then got all self-righteous with nonsense such as “more to life than sex”.
The truth is that most Asian and Indian men, due to a mixture of sex shaming and just priorities in general, do not go all in on chasing women and getting laid like say Italian men for example might. What this boils down to is Asian and Indian men not putting in the work to be as appealing to women, thinking that their academics and jobs are enough. Now couple in priorities to how a lot of these men come from cultures that encourage being docile and submissive, you have what you see out there.
90% of men out there, and I am being modest here, will not deviate from their culture. Most men will do the same thing their parents did and as a result, experience similar results.
Now could this impact perception? Yes, but as soon as a guy who doesn’t conform to the stereotype comes into the picture, women change their minds immediately. I have known enough good looking Asian and Indian guys in my life to say that the problem is indeed not based on race at all in most cases. In fact, any guy claiming that it is based on prejudice and racism is a race whiner who can’t be taken seriously.