age · culture · Game · inner game · lifestyle · personal · relationship · self-improvement

Can guys over 30 still succeed?

Lately, I have received a ton of mail from men over the age of 30 asking if it is too late for them to get into the game or if they can rack up a high lay count. In my years of winging with older guys, some even in their 40s, I realized that age does indeed play a role. However, in seeing certain older guys have success and certain ones fail, I came to some realizations that might be hard to swallow.

Why it will likely get a lot more difficult for you as you get older.

For most men who have messaged me, I will say that it will be difficult or perhaps even improbable that they will get the ideal success in game that they want. The main underlying reason is that whatever negative beliefs you have about women will get amplified with age. In other words, if you spent your twenties in black pill and red pill communities, barring some miracle, you will not succeed with women. Unfortunately, most older men that message me about game questions do have that kind of a background.

Your twenties, for so many things in general, are building blocks for what you do long-term. When it comes to women, it is no different. You might hear of the guy who didn’t have much luck with women in his twenties in regards to getting laid but somehow in his thirties, things changed. Well, here is how that story commonly goes.

In his twenties, this guy was still going on dates, getting matches on dating apps, and interacting with a lot of different women. While he may have dabbled with PUA and Red Pill, he was not going off the deep end on it. Even if he did get into some toxic views about women, he was able to snap out of it eventually and come into the game with more love and respect for what women can offer.

I am sure we have all heard of the red pill community and some of us have even been in them. Well, as someone who dabbled a bit in that community, the current version of me sees those guys as bitter jokes and clowns. My views about women became more positive and I started to genuinely love them which led to me getting laid more and more as I moved through my twenties. I am glad that this happened to me in my mid-twenties so I didn’t end up the bitter Incel that I was meant to be.

It’s a lot harder to get people to like you when they can sense that you don’t like them.

Now this is a concept that the Red Pill, Black Pill, and Incel movements cannot understand. You cannot hate women or see them as some inferior gender yet still get them to invest in you. Sure, some guys do end up having that success but they are not that common. Most of the times, women can sense the bitterness and toxic views in you when they interact. You might not say it, but it comes off in your vibe, body language, and how you present yourself to the world.

So it is no mystery why some guys who get into game after having such a strong background in the red pill find that they are struggling. Rejections hurt them a lot more than they would the average guy because they have such toxic views about women. Most of them cannot take a joke and take themselves too seriously. A lot of their bitter views and entitled demeanor comes out when a crisis presents itself.

Here is where age comes in.

A guy in his twenties who has such views might still be able to see the light and realize how for the most part, these are pathetic views. Most of these guys will see their red pill gurus and realize how these guys live such unsatisfactory sex lives that they should go elsewhere for advice. In your twenties, you can still change but it gets harder after the age of 25 or so.

My point being that someone in their twenties can still rid themselves of toxic beliefs about game that the have and still lay the foundation for being a thirty-something people can be around and relate to. Meanwhile, it is a lot tougher to change such patterns of behavior and belief in a thirty-something whose brain is naturally going to resist change more. So to do a complete 180 with women and dating after the age of 30 while having no foundation supporting it in your twenties is going to lead to a recipe for disaster.

So if someone was to ask me if a guy over the age of 30 can get it together and still have tremendous success with game, women, and dating, I would say this…

First, I would ask how was he really like in his twenties? How this man was like in his twenties, the experiences he had, and what he did will determine my answer. If we have someone who interacted with a lot of women and snapped out of a lot of the toxic views that are being taught to young men these days (black pill and red pill), I will say that it is doable.

However, if you gave me a thirty-two year old who has spent his life on black pill blogs, thinks like an MGTOW or one of the bitter red pill incels, and is angry towards women then I would actually turn down that challenge. The amount of work that guy who still ascribes to certain views about women and game as well as coming off as some out of touch internet incel would have to do is unreal. While I do believe in miracles, I would put his probability of success to under 5%.

People underestimate how tough it is to change bitterness, negativity, and bad vibes after a certain age.

I was a bitter guy in my early and even earlier parts of my mid-twenties. My views towards were women were misogynistic and unfortunately, I was just a hateful guy who could relate with the red pill a lot. However, it was not until years of interacting with people in a world class city and having tons of good reference points with that I finally snapped out of it in my late-twenties. For someone like me who was young, I am glad I did. Ever since, I have more friends and I get laid with higher quality women.

In my years of game, I have met a handful of men who have been like this as well and they have experienced a lot of success in their 30s. A couple I know are my wings and they are getting laid almost every weekend. However, it is because of what they did for themselves in their twenties not just financially and fitness wise but also mindset and demeanor wise that they are able to have this success. A number of them have said that if they tried that in their thirties, it would have been near impossible.

So can guys over the age of 30 succeed with women and have that high lay count? Yes, if they did things in their twenties which make it possible. However, if you took someone who is starting fresh in their 30s, I would say that it is quite improbable.

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