Before my health scare a couple of months ago, I had a moment that scared me. I feel like I bit my tongue. Millennial Bachelor blew up but for, what was in my eyes, all the wrong reasons. We were getting linked by Incel communities left and right and I feared that I was going to attract the wrong readership to this site. So, I silenced myself and deleted posts that were some of my most read posts on this blog.
Looking back at it and after having gone through some life-changing shit in recent months, I realized I did it out of fear. I feared that my site would send a message that can be interpreted by some crazy sexless dude the wrong way who would then do something fucked up and I would get blamed for it. I feared that Incels would flood this city and try to ruin it. I feared that I would get tangled up in drama I want no part in when I am really just a guy writing his thoughts and sharing his beliefs.
It came to me, what a pussy I was being. My own site, my own blog, and I silenced my own voice out of fear of judgment or fear of being attacked or tangled up in something I rather not be. If we do not have this free speech on our site, then what is there in this world? Nothing.
I realized after almost facing what was in my mind at the time death, I just don’t give a fuck anymore. I really don’t.
Not in the sense that I am giving up on this site but I just don’t give a fuck about who my writing offends or what way it gets taken by who because why should I? Why should it be my fault that I share an experience or opinion, some crazy sexless wacko reads it, and does some fucked up shit? It almost reminds me of that South Park episode about Butters reading Catcher In The Rye and going crazy.
I have a lot to share in the form of field reports, opinions, and theories, and I will no longer change or censor myself. I just don’t give a fuck anymore.
