After practicing daygame for almost all of 2022 and getting laid from it, I have realized that I have a few sticking points to work on. I have also realized that getting back into daygame after a long layoff of more than a month is tricky. However, despite the issues, I find that there are a few sticking points I need to work on with daygame and it might be those that a lot of guys come across. Here they are.
Not having my shit together mentally and not having my head in the game.
This is probably my big sticking point. Life gets in the way and I get affected so much to the point that I face setbacks. My head is not in the game, I feel drained, and I do not go in with the focus and sharp energy on some days. I have to work on getting it together mentally to where my head is in the game and not fall victim to getting in my own way. At times, I go out drained and my approaches reflect that. So much of what is going on in your life can impact your daygame results. Stress can have a major impact on libido. While I have come a long way in managing stress, I need to get better at it.
Worrying too much about what people think.
I have lost count of the amount of time I have not made an approach or been awkward with it because there were people around. My worry is legitimate and yes, some guys and girls will hate you when you go up to random women and try your luck. For guys who care too much about what others think, I think that daygame is an uphill battle. Men who come from overbearing families have to worry about daygame struggles and inner game issues for the reason that they are too shamed.
For me, I have made it a challenge now in February to do an approach in a crowd and go direct. I will let everyone know how it goes. I had a scary situation today where I approached a woman standing outside of a store and her massive and tall husband walked out. Thankfully for me, he was a cool guy but this could have gone downhill in so many ways. My Wing and I have learned the same lesson, whenever a woman is waiting outside of a store, she is usually with someone.
I have made it a goal to do at least one approach where the girl is in a crowd and go direct with it.
Fluctuation in abundance mentality.
In daygame, cultivating an abundance mentality is tough. Even if you are in NYC or Miami, you will run into dry spots and dry times. I often find that I can go for over 30 min and not see one approachable set but then out of nowhere, many pop up. You have to convince yourself that attractive women will come, they will be alone, they will be approachable, and pace. I have found daygame to be a great pacing exercise and one where you have to save your energy rather than burn out. Know that attractive women will be around and in the meantime, know your lines.
Not having lines or a framework prepared.
People say daygame should be natural but I disagree. I think that if you are opening women, you need to have some sort of a line or framework. The reason for this is because approaching is already nerve-racking and knowing what to reference takes that all off. I used to have some lines I could go to but now I need to reinvent them and get back at it. Once again, getting back after a long layoff is rough.
Not approaching and taking too long.
I have had moments where I let a set pass because it did not seem like the right time. It is a fine line in daygame and I am against being those spammy PUA types. In my opinion, those spammy PUA guys are too common in Miami and play the numbers game which leads to a lot of burnout. On the opposite end, you have the guys that go out for hours and do not do one approach which is just as sad. You have to find the perfect medium and make approaches. It gets awkward at times but your job is to make it as least awkward as possible. In my best approaches, it almost felt like to others that I knew the girl.
Nervousness in some approaches.
My first approach today got torn apart because I came off as nervous. I thought that the girl I was talking to was actually with her mom when the woman had turned out to call a name. Well, it turns out she was by herself but the situation was awkward. Needless to say, I had no luck. Robert Greene says in 48 Laws Of Power that when you go into action bold, it covers up the mistakes you are likely to make along the way. I have to learn to internalize this lesson.