It has led to shows starring Hayden Panettiere and has been the hype of a lot of things recently. So not that long ago in 2022, I decided to give Nashville a visit for a week. When I told my friends that I was going to Nashville, I received some warnings. Apparently, it is one of the most dangerous cities in America. I was unaware of this but I am glad that my friends gave me the heads-up that they did. At the time, I was also set to meet a few wings in my time out who would show me around so I knew I was in good hands.
As soon as my flight touches down, I get my luggage and get in my Uber. I spoke to my driver about the city itself as he offered his opinions as a long-time resident.
“It’s a shithole now fella,” he said.
“Why so?” I asked.
“Where do I even begin?” he asked, before taking a deep breath as a pause ensued.
“For one, all of the rents and real estate have shot up. Then, we have gone from a Country Music city to Poser Central with every wannabe country music fan flooding in here. Let me tell ya, Country Music attracts the worst fan of any genre out there man, they are as narcissistic as they come. Downtown smells like crap and vomit with homelessness getting worse by every passing year,” he said, in a sad tone.
Yeah…that was my reaction on the inside and my welcome to Nashville moment. However, I kept my head up and thought it was just one Uber driver. I settle down into my hotel room to rest up a bit before plans to meet up with an old friend from NYC. The day flies by and night comes as I ready up to meet with my old NYC roommate/friend. Time comes and I take an Uber out to meet my old friend at a Steakhouse on the other side of town.
“Damn city just gets worse every passing year,” said the driver.
“Ha, you’re the second person I have heard say that in my day here,” I replied.
“Just the second? I don’t believe you brother,” he says.
“I have heard homelessness, high cost of living, transplants ruining the vibe even more, and the whole laundry list really,” I said.
“You left out pretentious country music fans, drug addicts everyone, skyrocketing crime, and the everyone here being drunk, on drugs, or both,” he said.
The ride ends fast as I go meet my friend for a Steak Dinner. We caught up on old times in NYC and then he tells me about how he wants to get out of Nashville. Already on my first day, the third one in a row! He tells me how it was a mistake to move there, how pretentious the people are, and how the city is a hot bed for overcompensating Karens. Apparently, he has a girlfriend he met and she cannot stand the vibe either. I hear about how going out to a bar is more about the bartender networking with musicians and not getting you your drinks.
For the most part, the steak was not too bad. I got myself a nice Ribeye and the waiter overheard our conversation. Immediately, he cuts in.
“Preach!” he says.
“I mean I’ve had it brother,” says my friend.
“Me too, get me the fuck outta here, if it was not for my family I’d be done with this miserable place,” says the waiter.
We get into a friendly conversation and it seems like Nashville’s best days are long past it. I enjoyed a nice dinner and as much as it seems like Nashville has sucked, the food was not too bad. Not long after, my friend heads back. I decide to head back and catch up on some sleep too.
I wake up the next day to go on a tour of the city and find the vibe unnerving. I did the tour groups and sightseeing things as I usually do in every city but the vibe was different in Nashville. Not long after finishing one of the tours, we notice the reaction of the guide who seemed spent as if he didn’t even want to be there. An older couple standing near me even comment on his lack of enthusiasm for the job. The day passes by and I meet up with an old wingman from my days in NYC who had relocated to Nashville during the pandemic.
We start out at a pregame bar for drinks. A good wingman, just the kind of guy I need to change the mood of what has been an awful trip and depressing trip so far. We have a couple of Vodka Sodas as we talk about his time in Nashville and immediately, he says some of the same things. Around game, he talks to me about how standoffish the culture is and how you practically have to go for tourists.
“Dude, local girls are cliquey and usually go out in old college cliques of theirs. The guys in those cliques are defensive and I have almost been in a couple of fights because I happened to be close to getting a girl whose boyfriend later finds her that night messing around with another guy. It’s kind of an overrated scene here man,” he says.
“Then why do you stick around?” I asked him, a bit frustrated over how bad everyone’s view of Nashville has been so far.
“Because of my family being here and trying to sell their house but when they do that, I am done with this fucking place man. Never seen so many miserable women as well as fights break out on the streets due to miserable sexless dudes trying to get laid,” he replies.
“How have you done?” I ask him.
“I mean I pull every month, like once a month, but it is normally with a tourist or someone in town for the weekend. Local girls are cliquey, toxic, and loaded with drama,” he replies.
“Seems like the transplants have ruined the place,” I said.
“Don’t even get me started man. This place is Karen Central, you have no idea how bad the local women here really are,” he said.
After some drinks, we go out into town and do some sets. The first couple of sets are us approaching some cute blondes but they all seemed a bit standoffish. Finally, we hit it off with these two girls from California. Things are going well enough with them so we take them to another bar. As we walk the wild streets of Nashville, we see a fight break out and shield the girls from them. Right as we are walking, a group of drunk blondes (all mostly ugly) almost bump into one of the girls who was with my wing.
“Watch where you are going, bitch,” says one of the fat ones with a country singer hat.
“Classy!” I shout, laughing as the girl with us looks in disgust.
“Fuck you!” shouts the blonde.
Man, what a fucking boar of a human being. We keep walking around and get to a more chill bar where the experience overall is more relaxed. I hit it off well with my girl and my wing is making out with his. As we have a fun time with our girls, a mixed group of guys and girls approaches us. There are three fat blondes and two sleazy-looking guys, one looks woefully inbred and cross-eyed. The blondes try to talk to our girls but they ignore them as we do not even engage.
“Snobby as they come,” said one of the fat blondes.
“Bitch,” muttered one of the guys under his breath as he walked off. My wing and I looked in shock.
“The vibe in Nashville, kind of hostile isn’t it?” I asked, turning over to my wing.
“This place fucking sucks, a lot of people are like this here,” said my Wing’s girl.
“Yes and the guys are seedy, they try to get girls in their crew to talk to you and I have had a friend that even got drugged after a Country Music concert,” said my girl.
“Well, we do things differently in Miami, there the famous drug is one you snort yourself haha,” I reply, trying to change the topic.
Things went well, and I actually pulled that night, as did my wing. The girl was slim and perky but still a heck of a fun time in bed. Not a bad way to end the night in a depressing city. After we are done, I talk to her, and she tells me I am the only guy who has done her well that year. Apparently the guys in Nashville can’t even get it up and are too awkward with new women.
As we chat a bit more, she shows me her Instagram DMs. Full of guys trying to invite her to church and to come to Christ. She laughs at the DMs and pathetic attempts that men are making. One guy DM’d her 20 times and she was thinking of blocking him. I connect with her on IG and then we chat a bit about life in Nashville. She tells me about how she is done with the city and will move elsewhere in 2023, how awful and trashy the people have been. We go one more round that night before she leaves the next morning.
The next day.
My wing had a great time with his girl and I was ready to meet up with another wing. This wing is a lot more optimistic and so I go to meet up with him. We have some fried chicken for dinner and chat a bit about life in Nashville. From what he tells me, the same story, cannot wait to move out. I ask him why, as he is usually a jolly guy, and he talks to me about how toxic the people in Nashville are. He tells me about how it attracts the worst of the worst during Country Music concerts and how hostile everyone is.
We head out that night to a very busy part of town known for having the best bars. We walk around and there are two fights that break out. Cops also shut down some Hispanic guy selling Hot Dogs on the street because apparently, it was illegal. The vibe was one of the worst I have encountered in any major city I have been to. I am looking at my wing as I chat and then coming my way is some blonde on her cellphone who bumps into me.
“Watch it fucker!” shouts the blonde, who had the face of Ms Piggy.
“Dude you were on your cellphone the whole time,” says my wing.
“Fuck you dude!” shouts the blonde.
“Miss, I apologize for bumping into you, are you okay?” I reply, not wanting to escalate the situation.
“I’ll be okay when you have a stroke bitch!” replies the blonde. I give her a blank stare as we walk away.
“Go back to where you come from!” shouts the blonde. Wow, dude, this city has a really bad vibe to it.
“Hold on bitch, what you mean by that?” shout a couple of black girls near her.
“Don’t call me a bitch!” shouts the blonde.
We walk away but notice some shoving as people are recording. The blonde must have clearly been on something but man, this trip has been such a shitshow so far outside of the lay. We end up at a bar with a decent rooftop and have some drinks. Not long after, a couple of guys chat with us about how miserable life is in Nashville. One is a long-time resident that tells me about how it went downhill around 2010 and rapidly declined after COVID. I noticed that my dating app notifications are going off like crazy so my matches are taking off for sure.
My wing and I spend the rest of the night gaming some girls. We hit up a three-set and then seconds later, get confronted by a couple of guys who are with them.
“What? That is what yall do? Go up to random women at bars and talk to them?” says one of the guys who is fat and drunk.
“Yeah,” replied my wing.
“Get a life boy! Go find Jesus!” says the guy.
“Usually she is yelling Bible Verses at night when I take her back home,” replied my wing.
“Don’t you get smart with me boy I will put you in the hospital!” says the lardass.
“Relax, you’ll give yourself a stroke or heart attack at this rate Pillsbury,” replied my wing.
“Call me Pillsbur…!!!” shouts the guy, shoving my wing only for the door guys to get involved fast and kick tubby out.
I stood by and watched as the other guy threw an empty bottle in my wing’s direction that missed him and hit one of the staff. Staff shouts and the other guy gets thrown out. Women follow these guys as they were with them. My wing looks at me and laughs as the fat guy attempts to walk out the bar and then falls flat on his face.
“Boom faceplant!” shout one of the guys in a group walking by them. We laugh.
We walk around the bar a bit more but then one short chubby blonde walks up to one tall dude. The blonde attempts to talk to him but he ignores her. Soon, my wing points something out.
“Yo that girl shit her pants,” he said, noticing the blonde was wearing light-colored pants and shit could be seen inside of them.
“Yoooo, my n-gga, you shit yo pants!” shouts one black dude in a backwards hat.
“Why you make dooky in yo pants my n-gga?” shouts the black dude.
“Yo she shit her pants!” says a guy, as a group start recording. The blonde runs off as I think that this was the makings of a Nashville Karen.
We didn’t pull that night and I ended my trip to Nashville earlier than I expected. I fly back to Miami where I am glad to see decent people and significantly more attractive women. I’ve been to a lot of cities in the US and Nashville was one miserable dump. I have never seen a city with the smug attitude of San Francisco combined with the trashy behavior of New Orleans on Mardi Gras.
